


something binding us together

by growlery



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Background Relationships, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-17
Updated: 2015-09-17
Packaged: 2018-04-16 22:46:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4642845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/growlery/pseuds/growlery
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So Operation Get Monty a Girlfriend was a disaster, but Operation Get Monty a Boyfriend is going to be a roaring success, Jasper swears it. He knows where he was going wrong, now. There’s no way this can fail.</p>
            </blockquote>





	something binding us together

**Author's Note:**

> expanded from a chatfic between me and [yasmin](http://naessas.tumblr.com) re 10 Things I Hate About You AUs, because they are the best. this is only vaguely that kind of AU, and it’s also totally unrelated to the other high school AU i've written, whoops. background relationships mentioned in the tags are jasper/maya, bellamy/clarke/raven/wells, and some harper/monroe. title is from san francisco by the mowgli's.

**Monty Green**  
we need to talk

 **Jasper Jordan**  
??????????????????  
are you friend breaking up with me

 **Monty Green**  
............no  
we just need to talk  
meet me at the bike sheds before school tomorrow

*

Operation Get Monty a Girlfriend isn't going very well.

Jasper isn't one to admit defeat easily, but it's been two weeks since he and Maya started going out, like, officially, and he hasn't managed to find even a single girl who'll last longer than one (invariably disastrous) date with Monty. They made a pact when they started high school, that if either of them found someone willing to date them, they'd have to find someone for the other person, too, and Jasper is nothing if not a man of his word.

Jasper's kinda worried that Monty's going to, like, ask him to break up with Maya. He will, because they made a _pact_ , and Monty's his _best friend_ , but he just… really hopes Monty won't ask.

Monty's already at the bike sheds when Jasper gets there, pacing. This doesn't bode well. This doesn't bode well _at all_. Jasper tries to smile, pulls Monty into a quick hug hello before stepping back to let him speak.

"You said we needed to talk?" Jasper prompts, when Monty doesn't do anything but pace some more and hyperventilate a bit, his mouth moving soundlessly.

"Uh," Monty says. "Fuck, this is a lot harder than it was in the shower."

"I'll totally break up with Maya for you," Jasper blurts, and Monty's face creases up in confusion.

"That wasn't what I was going to say."

"Oh, thank god," Jasper says, exhaling slowly. "What were you going to say, then? You know you can tell me anything."

"I know," Monty says, chewing his lip. "It's just, you've been trying really hard with this dating stuff, and I feel kinda bad, because the reason things haven't worked out with anyone is-"

"None of them see how awesome you are," Jasper says, and Monty grins, seems to relax a little bit.

"Thanks, man," he says, "but I think the bigger problem is that I'm, uh, not actually interested in them." Monty coughs. "I'm. Uh. I'm sort of gay. Like. Really gay. Like only into dudes in every way it is possible to be into dudes. So. That."

"Oh," Jasper says, and then, " _Oh_."

"Yeah," Monty says, not looking at him.

"So that's why you started going to GSA meetings with Harper every week," Jasper says, realisation fully dawning. "I thought you were just a really great ally."

That means Harper must've known before Jasper did, which is… well, it makes sense. Jasper doesn't resent her at all. He knows this isn't about him. He listened when they talked about meetings, okay. He knows how to be an ally, too. It's really important and humbling that Monty would share this with him, that he trusts Jasper that much. 

If Jasper's a little bit hurt that Monty didn't feel like he could tell him about this before, well, that's just the codependency talking.

"That's how they get you," Monty says gravely. "You start off as an over-invested ally and before you know it, everything you own has rainbows on it and you know all the words to the songs from Rent."

Jasper laughs, and so does Monty, and Jasper hugs him again, holding on tight until Monty starts to squirm.

So Operation Get Monty a Girlfriend was a disaster, but Operation Get Monty a Boyfriend is going to be a roaring success, Jasper _swears it_. He knows where he was going wrong, now. There's no way this can fail.

*

 **Monty Green**  
I came out to Jasper!!!!!!!!!!

 **Harper Campbell**  
omg yay congrats!  
I'm so happy for youuuuu

 **Monty Green**  
:D  
first step Jasper  
next step the world

*

The week Monty Green comes out, Miller beats up a lot of assholes. Mostly the same assholes rearing their ugly heads now that they have a new target to pick on, but there are a few new faces he relishes in putting in their place.

It's not really about Monty, exactly. He's been coming to GSA meetings for a few months now, and Miller doesn't really know him outside of that; they have the same study period, and Miller's lent Monty a pen a few times. But when Bellamy took him aside and asked quietly if Miller would look out for him, Miller didn't even have to think about it before he said yes. Miller just… doesn't like bullies. 

As the other co-president of the GSA, Clarke doesn't exactly approve of Miller's methods, but she shares his understanding that violence is sometimes necessary, and also has a soft spot for Monty a mile wide, Miller knows. She doesn't say anything when he turns up to class with bloody knuckles, just sighs and drags him into the gender-neutral bathroom to clean him up, even when he's barely broken the skin.

"Careful," Wells says as he watches Clarke fuss over Miller, "you don't wanna let my dad catch you."

Miller rolls his eyes, but he doesn't get into any more fights. (At least that week, anyway.)

Coming out is the theme for the next GSA meeting. Clarke probably thinks she's being more subtle than she is; she doesn't seem to notice that Monty looks vaguely green when she asks if anyone has anything they'd like to share. Miller coughs.

"I came out to my dad a few years ago," he says. "It was hard, because it's just me and him, but he's been great about it. It's the one thing we don't fight about."

Bellamy nods at him, and Harper says, "My mom keeps asking me when I'm gonna find a nice girl." She rolls her eyes. "Like, I'm no less a loser because I'm a lesbian, mom."

"You're not a loser," Monty says loyally. He looks down, bites his lip. "I just came out. I haven't figured out how to tell my parents yet, but other than that, it's been great. People have been great."

"We're here for whatever you need," Bellamy tells him, and Clarke nods earnestly. 

"Well, I'm probably never gonna be out to my mom," Raven says breezily, and Monty shoots her a grateful smile as attention moves away from him.

*

Operation Get Monty a Boyfriend is officially a go, but Jasper has no idea where to start. He barely knows anything about girls; dating boys is entirely new and uncharted territory for him.

 _Lesbian_ , is Harper's input when he corners her for advice, and by corners he means passes her a note in class. _L-e-s-b-i-a-n. I know even less about dating boys than you do._

 _What am I supposed to do, then?_ he scribbles back. _Monty needs to feel the love of a good man!!!!!!!_

When Harper opens the note, she looks over at him, unimpressed, and when he just looks back at her, eyes wide, she purses her lips and shakes her head.

_You know who does know lots about dating boys?_

Jasper sends back a flurry of question marks. Harper's smile when she folds up the note is kind of evil; Jasper doesn't trust it.

_Nathan Miller._

Jasper gulps. There's no way he's lucky enough that there's another Nathan Miller at their school. Harper is definitely evil.

_rly? :(((((_

_He's been watching Monty's back_ , she sends back. _He's a good guy._

He just underlines his previous message and pouts at her as she reopens the note. She's smirking as she writes her response.

_I thought you cared about Monty's happiness._

Jasper swallows, but he recognises a gauntlet being thrown down when he sees one. He can rise to the challenge. This is for Monty's love life. He can _do this_.

*

"What," Miller says flatly.

"We made a pact," Jasper repeats, and Miller shakes his head.

"I got that part," he says, though it's still fucking weird. "What does any of that have to do with me?"

"You're, you know," Jasper says, gesturing vaguely at him in a way that's probably supposed to mean _gay as hell_. "I thought you could help me find him someone."

"Have you ever considered the idea," Miller says, "that Monty doesn't actually want to date anyone, and even if he did, it isn't your place to find him someone?"

Jasper just frowns at him, uncomprehending, and Miller sighs. If it weren't for the fact that he seemed really, genuinely sincere when he was explaining his and Monty's whole deal, Miller probably would've punched him already.

"Lets say I go along with this ridiculous idea. What's in it for me?" he asks. "And don't offer me money, I know you're broke."

Jasper makes a face. "I wouldn't _pay_ you. That'd be weird."

"That would be the weird part," Miller says, "of you contracting me as a matchmaker for your best friend."

"Yeah," Jasper says, and Miller just rolls his eyes. "I can get you weed, I guess?"

"I can get me weed," Miller says, "but yeah, fine, okay. It better be the good stuff."

"Only the best for my best friend," Jasper says, and he looks serious again. "Like, if you're doing this, you're doing it properly, okay? Someone good, and kind, and- and good. No asshole who's just gonna break his heart."

 _I wouldn't_ , Miller wants to say, but he just nods. "We have a deal, then?"

"Deal."

*

Now that Jasper's mission's back on track, he doesn't feel at all guilty about going to the movies with Maya. She wanted to see the new Terminator film, too, because Emilia Clarke, too; it's not Monty's thing, so Jasper thought he was going to have to see it alone.

"Girlfriends are _amazing_ ," Jasper sighs into the phone, after. "Or boyfriends in your case, I guess."

"Are you still on that? I told you I was happy being single right now."

"We made a pact," Jasper reminds him.

"Yeah, when we were fourteen and didn't have any other friends," Monty says, huffing down the line. "I don't secretly resent you and Maya. You don't need to do this out of some kind of misplaced guilt."

"It's not guilt," Jasper says immediately, because it's not. He knows Monty would never hold something over him like that. "You're my best friend. I just… I want you to be happy like I'm happy."

Monty's quiet for a while, long enough that Jasper thinks about asking if he's okay, but the silence feels sort of sacred, somehow.

"Okay," Monty says, eventually. "What were you saying about how great Maya's hair smells?"

"Oh _man_ ," Jasper says happily, and picks up pretty much right back where he was.

*

 **Monty Green**  
okay  
this is really fucking weird  
nathan miller's definitely following me  
you sure you don't know anything about this?

 **Harper Campbell**  
[angel emoji]

 **Monty Green**  
should I talk to him!!!  
maybe he just really likes beating up bigots  
but maybe he's like  
adopting me?  
is that a GSA thing?  
i mean clarke probably wouldn't approve but it's totally a bellamy thing

 **Harper Campbell**  
[angel emoji]

 **Monty Green**  
harp  
harper  
HARRRRPER

 **Harper Campbell**  
[angel emoji]

*

Miller corners Monty after a week of sizing up his friends, acquaintances and anyone he might have even a passing interest in, and getting absolutely fucking nowhere. They're all assholes, or straight, or both. Mostly both. Monty needs better guy friends.

"Jasper's got me trying to set you up with someone," Miller announces, "hi."

Monty closes his eyes and sighs very deeply. Miller feels his pain. Jasper keeps texting him, in all caps with no punctuation, to demand updates on his progress. Miller really regrets not punching him.

"Hi," Monty says, "this explains a lot. Sorry, I told him he didn't need to do this, but, well. Jasper."

Miller understands. "I can get him to back off if you want," he offers.

He didn't exactly corner Monty so much as hang around the GSA meeting space and wait for everyone else to clear out before approaching him, which is probably why this doesn't feel awkward. It's not like they're not friends, or anything, but the familiar shared backdrop is kind of comforting.

"Honestly, that would probably just encourage him." Monty sighs some more. "I can't believe he dragged you into this. It's so embarrassing, like it's first grade all over again and my mom's trying to get the other moms to make their kids play nice with the weird Korean kid."

"It's not," Miller says, "embarrassing, I mean." He coughs. "Got any other ideas?"

Monty looks at him strangely, but after a second, he shrugs.

"I mean," he says, "if I could convince someone to date me for just a few weeks, put up a convincing show for Jasper so he'll back off and get over the weird complex he's developed over this, then we could loudly but amicably break up and everyone could move on with their lives."

"Uh," Miller says, "yeah, that'd probably work."

"You've apparently been stalking me all week," Monty says, smiling crookedly at him. "Do you think anyone I know would be up for that?"

"I would," Miller says, before he can really think it through. "I mean, it'd just be for a couple of weeks, right?"

"Yeah, just long enough to make sure Jasper took the bait." Monty eyes him. "Are you sure? It's sort of a commitment."

"If it gets Jasper off my back, it's worth it," Miller says, and tries not to stare too hard at Monty's mouth when he smiles.

"All right then," Monty says, and they shake on it. "I love a good mutually beneficially scenario. So I asked you out after you approached me for information, and against all odds, you agreed."

Miller raises his eyebrows. "Against all odds," he says, "sure."

"Come on, have you seen you? I want this to be at least slightly believable."

There's nothing behind it except honesty, and Monty's grinning amiably, so Miller doesn't find it hard to be honest right back. "I'm pretty sure people would believe I'd be into you," he says, with one sweeping glance over Monty's body. When he looks back up, Monty's cheeks are pink. 

"Uh, thanks," he says. "Should still probably be me, though. Jasper might think it's a bit suspicious if you asked me out after he got you to set me up."

"Okay, fair," Miller acknowledges. "So how do you want to do this?"

"I don't think I'm into PDA," Monty says thoughtfully, "but we'll have to make it look good, so holding hands in the halls, walking each other to class, serenading each other with boomboxes, that sort of thing."

"Are you getting all your ideas about romance from shitty teen movies?" Miller asks, amused.

"Maybe," Monty says, grinning back at him. "What do you suggest?"

"Well, we should at least go on one actual fake date," Miller says. "Everyone goes to The Drop Ship for smoothies after school. There'll be tons of witnesses. It's the perfect setup."

"Oh man, that's genius." Monty hums happily. "You're gonna be a great fake boyfriend, I can just tell."

*

The nature of their school's gossip circuit is such that Jasper finds out that Monty and Miller are on a date almost before it actually happens. His next move is obvious.

"You're ridiculous," Maya tells him, but fondly, Jasper can hear the smile in her voice as he scans The Drop Ship's tables for Monty and Miller.

"I am just," Jasper says, with great dignity, "being cautious. Cautiously looking out for Monty's wellbeing!"

"Don't you think you're being a tad over-"

"There," Jasper hisses, ducking swiftly down, grabbing Maya's hand to pull her with him. "They're in one of the booths."

Maya glances at him, and then at the other side of the room where Monty's sitting down opposite Miller, putting their smoothies on the table in front of him. Jasper can't see his face, but he can see Miller's. Jasper narrows his eyes.

"Something's not right," he mutters. Maya just looks at him, her eyebrows raised. "Come on, do they look like people on a date to you?"

"Um," Maya says, "yeah?"

"Miller's barely even _looking_ at him."

"And there's no way that's because he's, I don't know, nervous," Maya says, scrunching up her face. It's really cute, like ridiculously cute, but Jasper can't let himself get distracted from the mission at hand. "Do you want them to be staring lovingly into each others' eyes or something?"

"I would be! Come on, it's _Monty_."

"You're ridiculous," Maya repeats. "What exactly do you think is going on here?"

"Miller's trying to pull one over on me," Jasper says, eyes narrowed. If he is messing Monty around so Jasper will think he's held up his end of the bargain, Jasper will _kill him_. 

Maya hums. "You have been kind of hassling him."

"Whose side are you on, here?"

"The side of justice, and reason, and not stalking your friends while they're on dates," Maya says, "come on, Jasper."

"It's not _stalking_ if you're in _public_ ," Jasper says, and then, "Oh, shit, they're getting up, they're leaving, Maya they're leaving already!"

"I noticed," Maya says mildly, but she doesn't straighten up until after Monty and Miller have left. Jasper might be a little bit in love with her.

*

 **Monty Green**  
red alert: it didn't work  
jasper didn't buy it

 **Nathan Miller**  
you're fucking kidding me.

*

It's not often that Miller makes it to school before the first bell, but he makes a special effort to get to Monty's locker early the next morning so that he can walk him to his first class in front of the whole school. It's what a boyfriend would do, so Miller is doing it.

(Miller doesn't do anything by halves, okay. For this to work, Jasper – and by extension, everyone else – has to really believe that they're doing this. He'll only get more insufferable if he figures out they were only pretending for his benefit, so they have to get this right. Miller has to get this right.)

He's so early that Monty isn't even there when he gets to the lockers, and neither is anyone else. Miller glances around to check, double-check, and then he picks the lock.

Monty has his schedule taped up on the inside, colour-coded and everything, right next to an old photo of what has to be him and Jasper when they were, like, foetuses. Jasper's hugging Monty around the waist, and Monty has the same grin, wide and totally unguarded. 

Miller smiles, fond, and starts retrieving the stuff Monty needs for the day. It takes him a good five minutes to sift through everything, and he may or may not put Monty's textbooks back in some semblance of an order when he's done. Monty might not thank him, but Miller will thank himself the next time he does this. 

"Morning," Miller says, when Monty arrives. Monty's eyebrows are at his hairline. "I broke into your locker."

Because that's what Miller would do, so Miller did it. He flashes Monty a grin.

"Thanks, I think," Monty says dryly. "Are you going to give me my stuff, then?"

"Nope," Miller says, still grinning, "I'm going to carry it while I walk you to your first class."

"And I'm the one getting all my ideas from shitty teen movies," Monty tells him, but he's smiling now, too, so Miller starts walking.

When they get to Monty's class, Miller stops, hands over Monty's stuff. "See you later, I guess?" he says. "I'll walk you to class after lunch, too."

Monty nods, but he doesn't move, except for how he's kind of twitching, squeezing his textbooks to his chest. Miller gives him a questioning look. Monty huffs a breath like a sigh, leans over, and presses the tiniest of kisses to Miller's mouth.

"See you," he says, and vanishes into the classroom.

Miller's still late to his own first class, but he can still feel Monty's lips on his when he takes his seat, so it's kind of worth it.

*

Jasper finds Miller in the weight room, doing press-ups in the corner, just like Raven said he would be. He looks up as Jasper approaches, but he doesn't stop until he reaches the next hundred, muttering it to himself as he gets to his feet. Jasper can't lie, he's more than a little bit intimidated, but he looks at Miller, narrow, and Miller just looks back at him, his face open.

"Here," Jasper says, eventually, holding out the baggie. Miller reaches out for it, closes his fingers around it, but Jasper doesn't let go. "This wasn't what I had in mind when I asked you to find someone for him."

Miller tugs the bag out of his grip. "It wasn't what I had in mind when I agreed. It just-" He looks down, licks his lips, looks back up again. "It just happened."

Jasper nods. Miller's nothing like what Jasper would've picked for Monty, not in a million years, and he's not entirely sure he trusts Miller, but he knows he trusts the look on Miller's face.

"I realise you could break me in half without even really trying," Jasper says, "but if you hurt him, I will hurt you. I have ways, and stuff."

"I get it," Miller says, something in his eyes like he's mocking Jasper, but his voice is serious, and that's good enough for Jasper.

"Good," he says, and with a brisk nod in Miller's direction, escapes from the weight room.

*

 **Nathan Miller**  
got the green from Jasper  
we should smoke together y/y?

 **Monty Green**  
yyyyyyyyy  
you are the BEST fake boyfriend

 **Nathan Miller**  
I try.

*

Miller heads straight for Monty's locker at the end of the day. Jasper's there too, of course, and he narrows his eyes at Miller as he approaches. He's pretty much the least intimidating person Miller's ever met, but Miller doesn't know how to tell him that without crushing him. Normally he wouldn't care, but he doesn't think Monty would appreciate it.

"Hey babe," Miller says, and Monty makes a face. Jasper nods sort of approvingly next to Monty, though, so Miller's gonna go with it. "Thought I could give you a ride home."

"Uh," Monty says, and looks at Jasper. Jasper makes little shooing motions. Monty shrugs.

"We'll have to get my bike from the shed," Monty says, and Miller nods. Monty nods too, and waves at Jasper as they head off. When he drops his hand, he reaches for Miller's, twines their fingers together, and Miller doesn't need to be able to see his own face to know it looks ridiculous. But that's the point, right? He's getting into character. He's playing his part well.

"You didn't have to do that," Monty says, when they're in the safety of Miller's car, waiting to get out of the school parking lot.

"Yeah, I did, Jasper's still suspicious." Miller checks his rearview mirror, glances back over at Monty. "Though I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm the only one pretending. He gave me the shovel talk earlier. It was kinda cute."

"Shovel talk?"

"You know, 'You hurt him, I beat you to death with a shovel.'" Monty still looks confused. "Buffy, man, have you never watched it?"

Now Monty looks sheepish. "I've always meant to?"

"Right," Miller says, "we're marathoning it, this tragedy can't continue."

Monty smiles. "Awesome," he says, and Miller could stare at him for hours, probably, but the cars in front of them have chosen this moment to decide to move, so Miller forces himself to look back at the road.

"Anyway," he says, "my dad can smell weed a mile off, so we should smoke it, like, now if we're going to."

"We're going to?" Monty's face lights up. "Where did you stash it?"

"My bag has a false bottom," Miller says, and Monty starts rummaging through it. "Can you roll while the car's moving?"

"Have you met me?" Monty says, grinning, and Miller has to laugh.

By the time he's driven them out to his usual smoking spot, an abandoned car park on the edge of town, Monty has three expertly-rolled joints sitting in his lap. Miller's impressed, he won't lie. He can barely roll when he's sitting still.

"Neither can Jasper," Monty says when Miller tells him this, rolling his eyes. "I've had a lot of practice. I'm pretty good with my hands now."

"Oh, _are_ you?" 

Monty choke-giggles on the smoke he just inhaled. "Fuck yeah," he says, waggling his free hand at Miller, "you would not _believe_ the things these fingers can do."

"Play guitar pretty well," Miller says, "or so I've heard."

Monty shrugs. "Reports of my talent have not been greatly exaggerated, I am pretty good." Miller laughs, and Monty grins, bright and sudden. "Hey, I could make you a mix tape! High school movie clichés and all."

Miller snorts. "Go for it, I'm sure Jasper would love it."

Monty smiles, exhaling smoke all over Miller's face. "Marco?"

"It's just us, unless you put someone in my trunk with your bike."

"Marco," Monty insists, and Miller smiles, says, "Polo."

Monty passes it over, and their fingers brush, and it's... it's nice. Like they're on a proper date. The Drop Ship had just been awkward, Miller not knowing where to look or what to say, and then Monty had sighed heavily and said, "He's right fucking behind you," and Miller had been relieved when they shortly made their escape. 

This, though. Miller could do this.

They pass the joint back and forth until it goes out, and Monty lights the next one, taking a few drags before holding it up for Miller to take. Miller does, and Monty watches him inhale through half-lidded eyes. Miller licks his lips. He takes a second to remind himself that this isn't a proper date.

"Was it okay," Monty says suddenly, "when I kissed you?"

"Yeah," Miller says. Not a proper date. _Not a proper date_. "I mean, you did say you didn't want PDA but I- I like kissing."

"I don't know if I like kissing," Monty says, and bites his lip. "That was my first, and it wasn't even properly."

"Oh," Miller says. He's feeling kinda heady. It's probably the smoke. "We could, you know." He gestures vaguely at their mouths. "It'd be practice. And you could see what it's like."

"Practice," Monty says, nodding, "yeah."

He takes the joint from Miller, puts it out in the ashtray. Miller starts to lean in, but stops short. Monty looks sort of frozen.

"You sure you want to?"

"Yeah, I just-" Monty makes a face. "I don't really know what to do?"

"Just let me," Miller says, cupping Monty's cheek, tilting his own face to meet Monty's mouth. He keeps it gentle, nipping lightly at Monty's lips to coax him into kissing back, feels it all the way down to his toes when Monty does. Kissing is the _best_ , especially when he's high, even if it's not- not real. It feels real, right now, and that's enough.

"Okay," Monty says, when he pulls away, "I think it's safe to say I like kissing," and Miller laughs, easy as anything.

*

♥ 46 likes  
**itsnateural** hanging out with my best boy @montygreening [tree emoji]

 **drewscrew** is that what they're calling it these days?  
**harpersichord** awwwww cuties!

*

Jasper tags along to the next GSA meeting, purely so he can better support his friends, of course.

"Sure," Harper says, holding the door open for him. It has a little sign hanging off it, with _Gay-Straight Alliance_ written through a rainbow, and _Trans Day of Remembrance_ in purple underneath. "I'm supposed to tell Maya when you get stalkery, you know."

Jasper would protest, but there are already a bunch of people here, and they're all looking at him and Harper a bit funny. He smiles his best non-threatening smile – Monty says it makes him look like an alien – and hurries himself into the seat next to her, putting his bag on the seat on his other side automatically.

Except when Monty arrives a few minutes later, holding hands with Miller, Miller tugs him into a seat on the other side of the room, and Monty goes without protest. 

And that's- that's fine. That's great. This is what Jasper wanted. He is absolutely not feeling remotely resentful as he grabs his bag back off the seat and dumps it on the ground.

"Just in case you were wondering," Harper says, leaning over so only he can hear her, "that's how Monty feels whenever you ditch him to go on a date with Maya," and Jasper scowls, but she shushes him and motions to the front when he opens his mouth to retort.

"...Trans Day of Remembrance next week," Clarke is saying, "so we're going to use this time to plan the events we'll be running for it."

"We're going to have a cake stall to fundraise and an after-school vigil as usual," Bellamy says, "but we also want to organise a clothing swap for trans students."

" _Bellamy_ wants to organise a clothing swap," Clarke says, and Bellamy's eyes flash dangerously, and Raven clears her throat. She taps at a sheet of paper hanging on the wall with her cane; all Jasper can make out is the title, _Ground Rules_ , but whatever she's pointing at makes Clarke sigh.

"And I think it's a great idea," she says brightly. "We'll need a few people at the donation point to collect stuff and distribute it later."

Miller raises the hand that's still in Monty's, and Bellamy nods at them both, looking satisfied.

"Right then," Clarke says, "any volunteers to run the cake stall?"

"I'll do it," Jasper says, before he can think about it.

Monty looks over at him, his face lighting up. Jasper smiles back, the weird thing in his chest suddenly gone.

*

Mr Jackson gives them his classroom to use for donations, promises to keep an eye on the stuff during his classes, because Mr Jackson is the best teacher. Bellamy starts them off with some binders he's outgrown, a bunch of t-shirts and some dresses Octavia never grew into. Miller had a clear out of his own a little while ago, so he didn't have anything to give.

"You're giving your time," Bellamy reminds him when he confesses this, clapping him on the back. "I'll be outside watching the door with Mr Jackson but if there's any trouble, just let us know, okay?"

Miller mock-salutes, and Bellamy grins, saluting him right back.

When Monty brushes past him to drop Bellamy's sorted donations in the appropriate boxes, Miller gives him a brief sideways hug without thinking about it, because Monty's right there, and so are Miller's arms.

"You don't have to do that," Monty says, giving him an odd look. "There's no one else here."

Miller valiantly does not droop. "Someone could come in at any minute," he reminds Monty. "I'm just being cautious."

"True," Monty agrees. He still looks kind of weird, and Miller hopes he hasn't fucked up, hasn't overstepped the mark. "It's just- you're doing a lot." He looks down. "Thank you. I realise I haven't said that yet."

"No problem," Miller says, and Monty doesn't look convinced, but a bunch of juniors come in with so many bags that they both have to go grab them.

"Seriously," Monty says, when the juniors have gone, "thank you. I know you're just doing it so Jasper will stop hassling you, but you don't have to go to all this trouble."

"If you want me to stop," Miller says carefully, "I'll stop."

"No, it's okay," Monty says, too quickly. He shrugs. "And it's practice, right?"

"Right," Miller echoes, trying not to think about kissing Monty in his car, his head fuzzy from more than just the drugs. "Practice."

*

**Monty Green**  
http://8tracks.com/droopedvines/the-first-day 

**Nathan Miller**  
you were serious?

 **Monty Green**  
I never joke about mix tapes  
I hope you like it :)

*

"Buy a cake, save a life," Jasper calls out, shaking the money box at the people passing by.

A few people have bought stuff, mostly Wells's vegan brownies, because they're literally the greatest thing you could ever put in your mouth – Jasper should ask him for the recipe, actually – but there are still boxes and boxes of untouched baked goods. Jasper is not impressed with the students at their school, and how little they obviously care about trans people.

He says this much to Maya when she stops by the stall, like she promised, because Maya is a great girlfriend and also a great person who _does_ care about trans people. Maya looks very much like she's trying not to laugh at him.

"Maya! This is serious," Jasper tells her, and Maya bites her lip.

"Trust me," she says dryly, "I'm aware. I'm agender."

"Oh," Jasper says, and then, " _Oh_." He swallows hard; he thought this would get easier, but it's awkward every time. Amazing and humbling, obviously, but he just wishes he knew how to respond. "Should I call you a different name? What about pronouns?"

"You can keep calling me your girlfriend," Maya tells him, patting him on the shoulder. "I'll let you know if that changes. It's just that you're kind of preaching to the choir here."

"Sorry," Jasper says, and Maya shrugs. 

"You didn't know. It's not a big deal."

"Still," Jasper says, but he leaves it at that. He knows it would be a dick move to make it a big deal, to make it about him. He holds his arms out, says, "Hug?" and Maya grins at him. 

Jasper feels a lot better after they've hugged it out, because Maya's hugs are amazing, but as soon as he looks back at the stall, he's morose again. He tries not to sigh too loudly. Clarke's gonna be so disappointed in him.

"I'll be right back," Maya says, grabbing a bunch of boxes.

She returns less than ten minutes later, the boxes filled not with baked goods, now, but with sweet, sweet money. She sets them down on the table, grinning triumphantly, and Jasper gapes at her.

"I took them around to the stoners who hang around the bike sheds," Maya explains.

"Why didn't I think of that," Jasper says, " _I'm_ a stoner who hangs around the bike sheds."

Maya helps him move the table closer to that end of the school and, sure enough, all of the cakes are gone within twenty minutes.

"You're a genius," Jasper tells her, as they're counting out the money to hand over to Clarke, "and I love you."

He stops short, dropping the handful of change he was holding back into the box. It's not that he doesn't mean it, because he does, he really does, but he didn't mean to just blurt it out like that.

After the most tense second of his entire life, Jasper feels Maya come up behind him, press a kiss to the back of his neck, wrap her arms around his waist.

"I love you too," she says, and Jasper's grin splits his face in two.

*

Miller doesn't really have a best friend, not like Monty has Jasper, or Clarke has Wells, or Bellamy has Octavia. He's the kind of popular where he gets invited to all the parties, people know his name and smile at him in the hallways, and no one gives him too much shit unless he was giving them shit first. It's a pretty good arrangement, all told, and it means he doesn't have to put up with much grilling about Monty, beyond the occasional time when he forgets himself and stares, or when he ends up talking about something Monty said in passing for half an hour.

At least, that's what he thinks, until Wells jogs up to him on the track during their warm-up for practice and says, "So, when are we doing the Buffy marathon?"

Miller narrows his eyes. " _We're_ not doing the Buffy marathon," he says. How does Wells even know about it? He mentioned it in passing to Bellamy, like, once, and Miller was pretty sure Bellamy was paying way more attention to Raven at the time, since that's usually the case when Raven's around. "Me and Monty are doing the Buffy marathon."

"Bellamy said we were invited," Wells says, eyebrows raised.

Miller glances over at the bleachers, at where he noticed Monty sitting with Harper earlier. Monty catches his eye and waves, his excitement clearly over-exaggerated. Miller's grimace turns into something more genuine, and he waves back.

Monroe wolf-whistles, and Well goes, "Aww," dry, and Miller breaks off to scowl at everyone. 

But, well, the whole point of this fake relationship is there are people around for them to be fake in front of, right? This is a good thing. If a tiny, negligible part of Miller was kind of looking forward to spending more time alone with Monty, well, that's entirely irrelevant to the situation.

"God, fine," Miller says, " _fine_."

"Excellent," Wells says, "because I could probably talk him out of it, but Clarke's got really into the idea and I'm pretty sure they're going to try and outdo each other in the embarrassing friend-parent stakes." He grins. "Raven's bringing popcorn."

Miller groans again, already regretting his decision.

*

 **Harper Campbell**  
so you know how I am your second most favourite friend  
and you love me and want me to have happiness in all things

 **Monty Green**  
I'm not helping you dispose of a body  
ask Jasper

 **Harper Campbell**  
you're a terrible friend  
but that is not the favour I wanted this time  
could you ask your bf if his teammate is single / interested in ladyfolk?

 **Monty Green**  
which one?

 **Harper Campbell**  
OH IDK  
WHICH PERSON ON A TEAM FULL OF DUDES AND ONE LONE GIRL WOULD I BE ASKING ABOUT  
clearly murphy obvs

 **Monty Green**  
ugh  
don't even joke

miller says monroe is single and not fundamentally opposed to ladyfolk  
she made out with clarke at a party once  
and she likes dorks  
so you're set

 **Harper Campbell**  
!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
ur the best  
say hi to miller for me

*

Monty's off sick, his mom texts Jasper to let him know, some horrible stomach bug that's got him feverish and throwing up violently but should probably be gone by the next day. Wincing, Jasper fires off a _get well soon_ message to Monty, accompanied by a sad cactus sticker. 

When he goes by Monty's locker to check his schedule in order to pick up the work for him, Miller's standing there, as seems to have become his habit, Monty's books for the day already in his arms. Miller frowns when he sees Jasper, very clearly without a Monty beside him. 

"Hey," he says, "where's Monty?"

"Probably has his head down a toilet, poor dude," Jasper says, and then, "Stomach bug," when Miller just looks confused. Jasper figured Monty would've told him; maybe he's sicker than his mom thinks. 

"Ah," Miller says. He glances down at the books he's holding. "Guess I should put these back."

"Actually, you saved me a job." Jasper glances over the books, makes a note of the classes Monty has today. "Just gotta check teachers-"

"Wick for Chemistry, Kane for History, Sydney for Government, Cartwig for Economics, Sinclair for Math." Jasper raises his eyebrows at Miller. Even he hasn't got Monty's schedule memorised. Miller suddenly looks very busy with Monty's lock, paying it far more attention than he seems to usually need to. "You pick up these things."

"Of course," Jasper says, because he doesn't want to get punched. "Thanks anyway, man, I appreciate it."

Miller nods back at him, and Jasper nods too. It feels like some kind of moment. Jasper's not sure how he feels about that. 

Miller's at Monty's locker again at the end of the day, leaning casually against it. He waves when he sees Jasper approach. 

"Hey," he says, "want a ride to Monty's?"

"Oh hey, sure," Jasper says. Miller doesn't usually offer him a ride home but Jasper doesn't take it personally; he figures Miller wants some time alone with Monty, and besides, Jasper's more than happy to walk back with Maya. 

The journey to Monty's is... well, it's not awkward, exactly, but there's a heavy silence for the first ten minutes until Miller switches the stereo on and Jasper lights up, goes, "Oh man, I fucking love these guys."

Miller grins. "This song's my favourite off the mix Monty made me."

" _Aww_ ," Jasper goes, positively delighted, "Monty made you a mix tape?"

Miller frowns for a second, but then his face clears. "Yeah," he says, "'cause he's into music, you know. It was cute."

It _is_ cute, and so is the smile trying to sneak onto Miller's face. Jasper finds himself smiling, too, and if he still has a weird feeling about the whole thing, well, things are starting to settle just a bit more into place. 

*

That Friday, when Miller and Monty walk out of school together, Bellamy, Clarke, Raven and Wells are all waiting at Miller's car.

"Fucking Christ," Miller says, under his breath, and Monty laughs. He's enjoying this whole charade way too much, which, whatever, Miller can't exactly pretend like he's hating it. He gets to hang out with Monty, like, all the time. Anyone would like that. 

Monty squeezes Miller's hand, waggles his eyebrows. "Let's do this," he says, and Miller shakes his head at him, but he's smiling as they approach his car.

"We're coming with you," Raven announces, before Miller can say anything, probably like _No_. "Or, well. They're coming with you. I'm driving Bellamy over."

"And I don't get a say in this?"

"Nope," Clarke says cheerfully. "You haven't let us do this with any of your other boyfriends, it's happening."

"That's because the only other real boyfriend I've had is Murphy, and no." Miller makes a face. " _No_."

Monty looks absolutely horrified. "You dated _Murphy_?"

"This was years ago," Miller says, "I didn't know any better."

Wells coughs. "So I brought brownies," he says loudly, and Wells is Miller's _favourite_.

"Your brownies are the best brownies," Monty says, beaming, but it's only a few seconds before he's frowning again. "Don't think I'm going to forget about your terrible taste that easily, Miller."

"Well, I'm with you, aren't I?" Miller says with a grin, and Clarke, Wells, Raven and Bellamy all go, "Aww," simultaneously. It's a little disturbing.

Miller's dad's working late, so the house is empty when they get there. Raven takes over the sofa in front of the TV and Bellamy sits at her feet, leaning back against the leg she lets dangle over the edge. Clarke and Wells take an armchair each, and then they're all looking at Monty and Miller.

"There's a lot of chairs for just you and your dad," Monty comments, looking kind of uncomfortable. It's a really nice house, Miller knows, doesn't try and deny it.

"We have guests a lot," Miller says. "I'll just get the DVDs."

Monty nods, taking the last sofa, which is next to Clarke. Miller's barely gone two steps upstairs before he hears her regaling Monty with embarrassing stories from their childhood, and he sighs deeply, but he can also hear Monty laughing, so he supposes it could be worse.

After he's got the first DVD started, he means to sit at Monty's feet, like Bellamy did with Raven, but Monty holds out a hand to him and Miller takes it, lets himself be pulled down next to Monty. It is big enough for the two of them, but they're sitting very close together, thighs touching, fingers still entwined. They haven't been this close yet. Miller wasn't prepared for how nice it would feel, how natural it would be to let himself lean into Monty's side.

Monty glances at him, as if questioning, and Miller smiles back, squeezes his hand. Just pretend, he reminds himself, it's just pretend, but his heart still pounds as Monty's head drops to Miller's shoulder.

Halfway through the season, the front door opens, and Miller's dad calls out, "Nate?"

Monty lets go of Miller's hand like it's hot. Bellamy looks over at Miller, then grabs the remote and hits pause. A few seconds later, Miller's dad comes through the living room door. His eyebrows go up.

"Dad," Miller says, "you're home early."

"Nate," he says, "you didn't tell me you were having guests."

"Sorry," Miller says, and his dad shakes his head.

"It's not a problem," he says, and he sounds like he means it, as well. "I just wasn't feeling up to cooking tonight. Did you want to get take-out for your friends?"

"I was going to make dinner for everyone, actually," Bellamy says, which is news to Miller.

"Oh, excellent," Miller's dad says, beaming at Miller. "Who's this young man, then? I approve of your taste in friends. No offence," he adds kindly to Clarke, who once nearly set their kitchen on fire when she and Wells slept over.

"Bellamy," Miller says, "and that's Raven, and this is Monty."

"Monty," his dad says, very even, "another friend?"

Miller glances at Monty, who hesitates a second, and then nods. "No," Miller says, taking Monty's hand again. "Monty's my boyfriend."

"Honestly, Nate, you never tell me anything," his dad says, but his eyes are warm, and he comes over to shake Monty's hand. "Nice to meet you, Monty. I hope my son's treating you well."

"Can't complain," Monty says, smiling at Miller, and Miller's dad nods approvingly. If Monty were Miller's actual boyfriend, he thinks, this would be heartwarming, or something. As it is, it just makes his chest kind of hurt.

"Well, I'll leave you to it," his dad says, and Bellamy says, "We'll call you when the food's ready," and Miller's dad beams at him.

They watch one more episode before Bellamy gets up and pauses it again – "You're not carrying on without me, fuckers," he tells them all – and they head to Miller's kitchen. It's a bit of a squeeze, all six of them in there, and Miller ends up pressed close to Monty's back. He pulls him into a hug without thinking about it, and then catches himself and freezes up, but Monty leans back into him, so Miller relaxes.

"So who's your favourite?" Raven asks, perching on the stool in the corner.

"Willow," Monty says immediately, and Raven nods, satisfied.

"You can keep him," she tells Miller, and Miller makes a face over Monty's shoulder at her.

"Thanks for your approval."

"That's what we're here for," Bellamy says, looking up from where he's chopping vegetables to smirk at Miller. "You could do better, honestly."

"Um, fuck you," Miller says, glaring at him, and Bellamy laughs. 

"I was talking to Monty."

"Oh, I know," Miller lies. Bellamy's still smirking at him, but Monty leans back against him, presses a kiss to Miller's cheek, and Miller supposes it was obvious enough already how gone for Monty he is. 

They eat in front of the TV, and Monty's head ends up on Miller's shoulder, an arm around Miller's back, hand curled around Miller's hip. Miller feels too stiff, too awkward, but Wells glances over a few times, giving them odd looks, so Miller forces himself to relax. Monty's hair feels soft through Miller's shirt, so Miller runs his hand through it, experimental. It is soft, and Monty makes a quiet noise at the contact, so Miller does it again, scratching gently at Monty's scalp.

They're still like that when the last episode finishes and Raven hits the stop button on the remote. Miller doesn't want Monty to move, has sort of forgotten what it feels like to not be touching Monty.

"Right, that's it," Miller says, getting up. It's like ripping off a plaster, and he feels suddenly cold. "Fuck off, all of you."

"Charming," Raven says, but gets up, leaning heavily on Bellamy. 

The two of them head to her car, and everyone else piles in with Miller. Clarke and Wells only live down the street, and then it's just Monty and Miller in the car, listening to the soft strains of the station Clarke tuned Miller's radio to on the drive down.

"Thanks for tonight," Monty says, as Miller pulls up to his house. "I had a really good time."

Miller nods. "I think they believed it," he says, and Monty looks away.

"Yeah, sure. Good night," he says, and then he's out of the car before Miller can say good night back, shutting the door gently behind him.

*

Monty turns up to Jasper's door and says, "We should hang out," without so much as a hello.

"Uh," Jasper says, because it's eight on a Saturday morning, and words are a little difficult before coffee.

"We haven't just hung out in a while," Monty continues. "I don't want to be those friends who start going out with people and then never hang out."

"Sure, yeah," Jasper says. "You okay, dude?"

"Amazing," Monty says, brushing past him to get inside, "never better."

He's curled up on Jasper's bed by the time Jasper's managed to trudge all the way back to his room, staring fixedly at his laptop. Jasper stops in the doorway, frowning at him.

"You haven't slept," he says, "have you?" and Monty shakes his head. "I'll bring you up some coffee."

Monty hasn't moved by the time Jasper returns with a mug in each hand, but he shifts over to let Jasper flop down next to him. Jasper glances at Monty's screen; he's got Buffy up on Netflix. 

"Did you have your marathon yesterday?" Jasper asks, and Monty nods. "How did it go?"

"It was good. Miller," Monty says, and seems to get lost after that, his brow furrowing.

"Miller," Jasper repeats, hoping to prompt Monty into explaining.

"Dating is weird," Monty says, and Jasper frowns. 

"Good weird or bad weird?"

Monty doesn't look any less lost. Jasper gulps down some coffee and wraps an arm around Monty's shoulders, squeezing.

"If you don't wanna talk about it, that's cool," he says, "but you know I'm here if you do, right?"

"Yeah," Monty says, "thanks, man," and Jasper hugs him a bit tighter.

*

 **Jasper Jordan**  
so we just had the BEST idea

 **Maya Vie**  
did you really need to include me in the group chat  
since I am  
you know  
sitting right next to you

 **Jasper Jordan**  
of course I did!!  
it was your idea too

 **Nathan Miller**  
and this idea was?

 **Jasper Jordan**  
DOUBLE DATE DOUBLE DATE

 **Monty Green**  
oh god.

*

They go bowling, of all things. Miller hasn't gone bowling since he was a kid, when his mom was still alive. He is, predictably, terrible. Monty and Jasper are both decent, but Maya is some kind of bowling _fiend_.

"That's your third strike," Miller says. It's only the third go. "How do you make it _do_ that."

"Magic," Maya says, very seriously, and does a little twirl on her way back to sit next to Jasper.

They've both been watching Monty and Miller closely since they got there; Miller's doing all the expected stuff, getting Monty drinks, leaning into him when they're sitting down, letting Monty tease him for consistently rolling gutter balls, but it doesn't seem like enough, somehow. It doesn't help that whenever Monty leans into him, Miller remembers Monty being pressed up against him, remembers Monty's head on his shoulder, remembers carding his hands through Monty's hair.

He rakes a hand over his face. He needs to pull himself together.

"Here," Monty says as Miller gets up for his turn, "let me show you."

He comes up behind Miller, puts hands on his back and shoulders to fix his posture, hooks his chin over Miller's shoulder to position the ball better. Miller swallows, hard, very glad that none of them can see his face.

"Don't think about it too much," Monty says, right in Miller's ear, and then he's gone, and Miller exhales very deeply.

He actually manages to knock over some pins, this time, and Monty cheers like he did something amazing. Miller grins despite himself, pleased, and when he knocks over even more on his next roll, he does a little victory dance back to his seat.

"That was _adorable_ ," Monty says, and Miller flips him off, but Monty just looks even more endeared.

Miller kisses him, mostly to stop Monty looking at him like that, but also because it feels like the thing to do, but also because he just really, really wants to. They've done it a few times, now, and it's easy to fit their mouths together, to curl a hand around the nape of Monty's neck and pull him in close. Miller could get used to this, he thinks, if he let himself.

Maya wins, obviously, and Miller's about thirty points behind her, but it's a pretty intense battle between Monty and Jasper for second place. Miller pulls Monty close before he can get up for his last go, says, "For luck," and kisses him, and Monty bowls a strike and a spare. Miller jumps to his feet, cheering so loud he can feel people staring, but he doesn't care.

*

"Okay," Jasper says, "you two are fucking adorable. I take back every doubt I ever had about your relationship."

"That means so much, Jasper," Monty says, and Jasper doesn't need to see his face to know what expression he's pulling right now. "Thank you."

"The sheer radiance of your love for each other outweighs the force of your sarcasm," Jasper tells him, "and also, fuck you, my opinion matters to you."

"It does," Monty says, and Jasper beams at his bedroom ceiling. He's quiet for a few minutes, happy just listening to Monty breathe on the other end of the line.

"But seriously, dude," he says, eventually, "I'm so happy for you guys. And I'm so proud of you for finding, like, true fucking love in this world that hates you just for who you choose to be with."

There's a silence, several beats too long, and then Monty just says, "Uh. Yeah."

"Monty?" Oh, god, Jasper fucked up. "I shouldn't have said the thing about choice, should I, shit, of course it's not a _choice_ , I just meant-"

"I know what you meant," Monty says. "It's just- it's not like that. We're not- we're not."

"You don't have to pretend with me, Monty," Jasper says earnestly. "And it's okay if you don't want to use the words, but-"

"I swear to god, Jasper, I love you, but if you're going to give me a speech about toxic masculinity and the gay male community, I'm hanging up right now."

"I wasn't going to!" Monty huffs a laugh, and Jasper insists, "I wasn't, seriously, I just- I was _right there_ , okay? It sure looked like true fucking love to me."

Monty's quiet again, but Jasper figures he's having some kind of feelings epiphany, so he leaves it be.

"I've told you about how Maya and I are also in true fucking love, haven't I?" he says, and Monty laughs.

"Three times," he says, "but go on, tell me again."

*

 **Monty Green**  
red alert: it worked TOO WELL

miller  
miller are you there  
miller i'm panicking  
MILLER

*

Miller's at Monty's locker early, like he always is, these days, leaning back against it with Monty's stuff in his arms. Monty arrives fifteen minutes before the bell, making a beeline down the hall straight for him.

"Hey," Miller says, smiling at him. Monty doesn't smile back.

"Did you get my messages?"

Miller frowns. His phone died while they were out, and he hasn't got round to charging it yet. "Nah, what's up?"

Monty bites his lip, glances around them, and then drags Miller into an empty classroom. Monty's stronger than he looks. Miller would enjoy it, normally, being manhandled just a little, but Monty looks... agitated.

"Monty," Miller says, soft, "what's wrong?"

"Jasper thinks we're in love," Monty says, and Miller's stomach drops. "Or, whatever, doing something that isn't going to just amicably dissolve like we planned."

"What do we do?" Miller asks, keeping his voice carefully neutral.

"I don't know," Monty says, and he looks like he might start shaking. Miller wants to hug him, hold him, but he doesn't think that'd be very helpful right now. "I'm just- fuck, this wasn't the deal."

And this is Miller's chance, the right moment to tell Monty that he doesn't care, that he was all in from the start, but Monty looks _miserable_. Miller can't be that selfish.

"It's okay," he says, "we can fix it. We've been hanging out a lot. Of course it looks like we're serious. So we should just... stop doing that."

Monty nods. "We can tell people it wasn't working out," he says. "We're better off as friends."

"Yeah," Miller says, even though his chest is tight. "And it'll be mutual."

"Mutual," Monty says, "yeah."

Miller hands over Monty's stuff, looks down. "Guess I'll not be seeing you, then."

Monty shakes his head. "A week's a good cool-off period, right?"

Miller shrugs. How would he know? It's not like he's ever tried to break up with someone he got too into pretending to date before. He never would've agreed to this if he had. 

"One week," Monty says, decisive, "and then we break up for real."

"Great," Miller says, and very determinedly does not flee.

*

Miller's not at Monty's locker when they get to school. Jasper frowns, and frowns harder when he glances sidelong at Monty and his shoulders have drooped. He doesn't ask, doesn't want to poke at a sore spot, and, hey, it's probably nothing, right? Miller's just running late, or something.

But then they bump into Miller in the hallway, and Jasper sees the moment that Miller spots them, starts to move towards them, and then freezes up. With one glance at Jasper, he spins on his heel and walks quickly away. 

"What was that about?" Jasper says, taken aback. 

Monty shrugs. "No idea," he says, and Jasper narrows his eyes at him, but doesn't push it. 

He doesn't say anything when Monty starts and deletes eight messages to Miller in the space of half an hour, either, or when Monty walks straight to the bike sheds after school instead of heading to Miller's car like has become their routine, but something's going on, Jasper knows it, and he doesn't like it one bit. 

"Miller's been acting weird, too," Bellamy says, frowning. 

"He cancelled a date last minute because of practice," Jasper says, "you don't even have practice on Wednesdays!"

"And Monty didn't even bother telling him he was ditching him to help Harper out," Bellamy counters. "Miller was waiting for him for _hours_."

Jasper sighs. Even he thought that was harsh. "They're just- teething problems. They're still figuring each other out. It's not like they've been dating long."

"Teething problems," Bellamy says, unconvinced, "sure."

*

It shouldn't be difficult to just... stop hanging out with Monty. They were barely even friends before, and a few weeks of pretending to be dating really shouldn't change anything. He's gone a week without seeing friends before, and it's never felt like this, like there's a tangible hole in his life that he keeps trying to fill with jokes only Monty would find funny, the kind of soft drink Monty likes, the drive home that takes him down the street Monty lives on.

Miller's started bringing food to eat in the weight room after workouts. It's not that he's avoiding his friends, exactly, but they're starting to look _concerned_ , and Miller really doesn't need them to get any more involved in this whole mess. 

His plan backfires, though, when he goes to the weight room one day and Bellamy's already by the weights. 

"Hey," he says, before Miller can leave, pretend he was never there. "Spot me, will you?"

"Sure," Miller says, on an exhale, and goes over to him. Bellamy looks up at him, intent. It loses some of its usual authority upside down, but he still looks pretty serious. 

"What," he says, "is going on with you and Monty."

Miller's shrug is maybe unnecessarily aggressive, but he really does not want to have this conversation.

"It's not really working out. We shouldn't have started dating. We were better off as friends."

"Wow," Bellamy says, shaking his head as he lowers the weights. "Try and sound less like you're reading from a script, next time?"

Miller just shrugs again. Bellamy sighs. 

"Jasper swears you were, like, stupid in love just last week," he says. "What happened?"

Miller looks away. "We don't want the same things," he says. "It was fun, for a while, but he doesn't- we don't want the same things."

Bellamy's quiet for a second, but then he says, "Okay," and leaves it at that. 

At the end of the day, Miller shuts his locker to Monty standing there, arms folded. It's the first time Miller's seen him properly in days. Miller should be happy, but his chest is tight.

"Hi?"

"Hi," Monty says, "why does Bellamy think I'm breaking your heart?"

"All I did was give him the _it's not really working out_ speech." Miller grits his teeth. He is going to kill Bellamy Augustus Blake, fucking interfering _asshole_. "Just like you said."

"Yeah," Monty says, "why do I have to come off as the asshole?"

Heat flares in Miller's veins and he snaps, "Oh, do you need me to do that too? Sorry, I figured you could do one fucking thing without me to hold your hand."

Monty's eyes narrow. Miller knows him well enough, now to see the hurt pulling the corners of his mouth down, but he doesn't apologise. He isn't sorry. He's fucking tired.

"Fuck you," is all Monty says, and then he's storming off, away from Miller. Good fucking riddance, he thinks, but it's hollow, just like the rest of him.

*

By the end of the day, the entire school knows about Monty and Miller's fight. Jasper has no idea how it all went so wrong.

"We're in high school," Maya points out, "it happens."

"It's not going to happen to us," Jasper says, and Maya just sort of pats him on the shoulder. "And it shouldn't happen to Monty and Miller. They can still fix this, right?"

"I can't believe I have to keep telling you this," Maya says, "but your level of investment in Monty's love life is not healthy." She makes a face. "What am I saying, of course I believe it."

"I just want him to be happy," Jasper says, his mouth pulling down at the corner, and Maya's face softens. "And I just-"

"Hey guys," Monty says, loudly, from behind them, and Jasper jumps.

"Hey," Jasper says, sheepish. He wonders how much Monty heard. It's nothing he wouldn't say to Monty's face, but it feels weird talking about him behind his back.

"We heard what happened," Maya says, "are you okay?"

Monty nods. "Pretty sure whatever you heard was a lot worse than what happened, honestly," he says, and normally Jasper would believe that, because the rumour mill is an unfathomable beast at the best of times, but the look on Monty's face says otherwise.

"Are you breaking up?" Jasper asks, small, and Monty shrugs, slams his locker shut. "I'm sorry."

"This wasn't your fault."

"I still shouldn't have tried to push you into something you weren't ready for." He glances at Maya. "I know that now."

"It's fine," Monty says, tired. "Can we not talk about this? I don't want to talk about this."

"Sure," Maya says, and gives Jasper a meaningful look before swiftly changing the subject.

*

Miller's not in the best mood when he gets to school the next day, so when some asshole in the hallway starts talking shit about Monty just as Miller passes them, it's almost instinctive for Miller's fist to connect promptly with their face.

He does end up in Principal Jaha's office, for the first time in months, because he hasn't made the mistake of picking a fight where there are teachers around in a long time. Jaha sighs.

"I thought we were past this, Nathan," he says. 

Miller just scowls back at him, and Jaha sighs some more.

He doesn't end up getting suspended, because Jaha's on this weird personal improvement kick that somehow involves adopting Murphy as some kind of pet project. It's intensely weird for everyone, especially Wells, but Murphy's been, like, 17% less insufferable since Jaha's whole thing started, so Miller has to say he's a fan.

Anyway, the point is, after Miller's written a list of Things To Work On So My Anger Doesn't Get The Better Of Me Again Or At Least Not Where Someone Who Cares Can See and given it to Jaha to sign off, he's allowed to go back to class. Which he actually does fully intend on doing – catch-up's the worst, and he promised his dad he'd pass all his classes this year – until he bumps right into Monty on the way out of Jaha's office.

"Uh," Monty says, "hey."

"Hey," Miller says, his voice carefully blank. Monty was clearly waiting for him. Miller doesn't know what to think about that.

"I heard about the fight." Monty stares intensely at the ground for a minute. "You don't have to keep, whatever, looking out for me."

"We're friends," Miller says tiredly. "Friends look out for each other."

Which doesn't feel like too much of a stretch, honestly, but Monty's face does something complicated.

"Yeah," he says, "and I was a giant dick. I had no right to get mad at you for doing what I fucking _asked_ you to do. I'm sorry."

"Monty," Miller says, but then Monty hugs him. On some level, Miller is aware that this is Monty hugging him and not Monty-his-fake-boyfriend hugging him, and it's… nice. Too nice.

"Thank you," Monty says, stepping back. "Not just for going along with this stupid charade but, you know. It was nice kind of getting to know what dating's like." He smiles. "You really were the best fake boyfriend."

Miller wants to slam Monty into a wall and kiss him until they're both dizzy. He wants to take him home for dinner with his dad, properly. He is the _worst_ fake boyfriend.

"Any time," he manages, and Monty hugs him again, turning his head to kiss Miller's cheek. 

*

 **Monty Green**  
we broke up.

 **Jasper Jordan**  
:((((((((((((((((((((  
on my way

 **Monty Green**  
♥

*

Monty's mom lets him in, tells him to go straight up. Monty hasn't found a way to come out to his parents yet, but she knows something's wrong, Jasper can tell. 

(He can also tell that she wouldn't mind if she knew about Monty, would take it in her stride and not for one second let it change the way she feels about her son, but it's not Jasper's call to make.)

Monty's lying on his bed, flipping through an old comic, when Jasper pushes open the door. He looks up, gives Jasper a watery smile. 

"Do I need to kill him," he says, immediately, and then amends, "Or get Harper to kill him, I'm kind of puny, but killing Miller can definitely happen."

Monty laughs softly, and Jasper goes to lie down next to him, wrap him up in a full-body hug. 

"Appreciate the thought, man, but it's unnecessary," Monty says. "It was mutual. We just- it was for the best."

 _Bullshit_ , Jasper wants to say, but if there's one thing he's learnt from all this it's that he doesn't know Monty better than Monty knows himself. It's a hard lesson to take to heart. 

"What happened?"

"Nothing," Monty says, "it just wasn't working out. We're better off as friends."

"Sure you are," Jasper says, because he only has so much self control, and Monty leans into him for a second, his breathing shallow.

"We are," he says softly. "We were just doing all the stuff people expect you to. It wasn't- it wasn't real."

"Looked real to me," Jasper says softly, and Monty's laugh sounds bitter. 

"It would," he says, which doesn't make any fucking sense, but this isn't for Jasper, none of this is. All he has to do is listen. "We're not some love story, Jas, we're not like you and Maya."

Jasper hugs him tighter. "I know that," he says. "I know. I really wanted you to be, though."

Monty's quiet for a second, and then he says, "Yeah. Me too."

*

There's no reason for Miller to keep avoiding Monty, now that they've cleanly broken themselves apart, but Monty doesn't make a point of seeking Miller out and it's too easy to just… not see him. Staring at the back of his head during their study period doesn't _count_ , okay; it's not like Monty ever looks back at him. 

(He's not moping, either, no matter what his friends say. He just… needs some time to pretend to get over the pretend breakup of his pretend relationship. That is all.)

"I'm having a party," Clarke announces, halfway through lunch. "Miller, you're coming. You need something to cheer yourself up."

"I'm cheerful," Miller says. Raven coughs, and Clarke just raises an eyebrow. Miller scowls. "Fine."

"You don't mind if I invite Monty, too, do you?" she asks, but nothing about her voice makes it sound like a question.

"Are you micromanaging your friends' lives again," Wells says, narrowing his eyes, and Clarke just sort of hisses at him. Miller officially wants to hide from everything.

"Do what you like," he says, determinedly non-committal, "I don't care," and doesn't spare them another glance before grabbing his tray and leaving.

*

Clarke invites Jasper and Maya to her big party, and Jasper knows it's 90% because of Monty, but he's still ecstatic. There are lots of things that can be decisively said about Clarke Griffin, and one of them is that she knows how to throw a party.

"Shots?" she asks, offering the tray. Maya takes one, and clinks it against Clarke's.

"Where's Wells?" she asks, glancing around. 

"Bellamy's keeping him distracted," Clarke says brightly. "I think making out might be involved."

"Distracted from what?" Maya asks, at the same time Jasper squeaks, "Making out?"

Clarke winks at him, which answers precisely none of Jasper's questions. "You'll see," she says to Maya. "Where's Monty?"

"Isn't he right behind us?" Jasper spins around. "I swear he was right behind us."

"I'm here," Monty says, suddenly reappearing in front of them, paper cup in hand, "hi."

It's already mostly empty. Jasper might be a little bit concerned.

"Hey," Clarke says, beaming at Monty. "Shots?"

"What are they?" Monty asks, frowning, and Clarke shrugs.

"Something Raven brought. Tastes like paint stripper. It's _great_."

Monty looks at her a little dubiously, but he downs the shot he takes without further comment, making a face. 

"So, you and Miller," Clarke says, like she's trying to be casual. "We all thought you had something great there."

Monty makes a face, takes another shot, makes another face. "It wasn't working out. We're better off as friends."

"Yeah," Clarke draws out, "we know. That's why you've looked super miserable all week. Though I guess you're half right," she continues, innocent. "Miller's taking it really well."

Monty looks like Clarke kicked him. Jasper sort of wants to kick _her_. Monty grabs yet another shot glass and forces a smile.

"First break up," he says. "It's fine, I'm over it."

"Speak of the devil, I think Miller just got here," Clarke says, and Monty promptly tries to hide behind Jasper. Jasper lets him; he knows where his loyalties lie. "Huh, is he with _Murphy_?"

Monty stops short. Jasper frowns; Miller did just walk through the door, but he's definitely alone, definitely no Murphy in sight.

"I don't see-"

"Yep, he's with Murphy," Clarke says loudly, giving Jasper meaningful eyebrows that he does not remotely understand. Monty seems a bit too drunk to notice; Jasper doesn't think that was his first beer they saw him with. 

"I think they might be making out," Maya helpfully puts in, and Monty makes a wounded noise.

"I guess he's rekindling an old flame," Clarke says solemnly, and, oh, okay, _now_ Jasper gets it. "It's a good thing you're over him."

"I need another drink," Monty says, and lurches over to where Miller is standing.

Clarke high-fives Maya, and Jasper stares at them, not sure if he's appalled or in awe.

"That was _evil_ ," he says, a mixture of both, and the two of them grin at him.

*

Clarke's party's in full swing by the time Miller gets there, the good kind of loud, a crush of bodies right from the door that he has to squeeze through, push back against. This might actually be exactly what he needs to get over Monty, he thinks, to get the feel of him out from under his skin.

But then, as if summoned by thought alone, Monty appears in front of him. They just stare at each other for a second, the moment suspended between them, and then Monty trips right over a pile of crumpled red cups.

"Whoa," Miller says, grabbing hold of him before he faceplants into the floor. It's wooden, and shiny, and Miller has nearly broken his nose on it before. "Are you okay?"

"Did I ever tell you how nice your arms are," Monty says, the edges of his voice all blurry, "because your arms are like. Super nice. Superhuman nice. Super _hero_ nice."

"Clarke plied you with alcohol, didn't she," Miller says, amused.

"There were shots," Monty says, sounding just a little bit mournful, but he quickly narrows his eyes. "Hey, don't distract me from your betrayal."

Miller's not even pretending not to laugh at him at this point. "And how did I betray you, exactly?"

"Not me, Wells! And Raven! And everyone else Murphy's been a piece of shit to. How could you?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Miller tells him, "and also you should probably sit down before you fall over again."

Monty tries to protest, but he's also definitely wobbling, so Miller ignores him. He guides Monty to one of the free sofas in the corner, away from the crush of the party. Monty doesn't let go of where he's clutching Miller's waist, and Miller's a bit wary of trying to pry him off, so the two of them pretty much just collapse onto it, Monty flopping against Miller. 

Miller pushes gently at him, trying to get him to move over – it's a pretty big sofa, room enough for two of each of them – but Monty just sways back into him, all but sitting in his lap, this time. Miller decides that he can handle that more than he could handle Monty _actually_ sitting in his lap and lets it be, trying not to think about how close Monty's mouth is, how good it feels to touch him after so long apart.

Miller sighs. So much for this being a chance to get over Monty.

"Oh, hey," Monty says, grinning, and starts singing along with the song that's just started playing. 

It takes Miller a second to recognise it, but then he smiles. It's that band that Jasper likes, the one that Monty put on the mix tape he made for Miller, the one that he didn't tell Jasper about. Monty has a nice voice, soft and smooth. Miller's isn't great, but he can carry a tune, and he joins in for the chorus. 

Monty's smile shifts into something softer, shadowed in the low light, and in the next heartbeat it's gone, pressed soft to Miller's mouth instead. Miller has time to think _what_ , for his heart to start to pound, before Monty shrinks back. 

"Shit," he says, with feeling. 

"What," Miller says, but Monty's flopped back on the sofa, hands up to cover his face. He's grimacing under it, Miller can just about tell. 

"Can we just," Monty says, muffled, "pretend that didn't happen," but Miller's mind is still reeling, the pieces moving just too fast to fall into place. 

"You- you made me a mix tape," he says, a little bit helpless, and Monty's hands part. 

"You didn't come here with Murphy," he says, "did you?"

Miller has to laugh. "Is that what you were so upset about? Fuck no."

Monty sighs, but he takes his hands all the way off his face. "Clarke is a lying liar who lies," he tells Miller, somewhat superfluously, and then, "I'm really glad you're not already pretend-over our pretend-relationship."

Miller smiles. It's not as hard as he thought it would be to be honest, to say, "It was never really pretend for me, anyway."

"Oh," Monty says, and then, " _Oh_ ," and then he's pulling Miller down, pressing his grin against Miller's own. 

*

♥  
In a Relationship With Nathan Miller

Bellamy Blake, Clarke Griffin and 63 others like this.

 **Jasper Jordan** I TOLD YOU  
**Jasper Jordan** true fucking love  
**Jasper Jordan** ♥♥♥

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